Short Fingered Vulgarian

by Cryptic

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Recorded by Clint Hoekstra and Jon Pord @ Clint's Haus in Edmonton, Canada
Mastered by Jon Pord
2016 Bum League Records


released November 5, 2016

Vocals - Laurel
Guitar - Claire
Bass Kevin
Accordion - Lando
Percussion - Jon




Cryptic Edmonton, Alberta

Cryptic are a three.....wait, now we're a 6 piece band from the double winter necropolis of Edmonton.
We play swing-rye-punk-puke-math-core garbage.

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Track Name: Donald Fucking Trump
His shits are made of diamonds, yet he somehow still survives.
He always fucking wins and his hands are fucking huge.
He’s not a politician and he loves them Jews.
Donald Fucking Trump is the best man ever.
His wife is fucking gorgeous and his tower's even better.
He’s richer than that prick Bill Gates and smarter than Hawking.
He knows the best words and he never stops talking.
Hillary Clinton is the goddamn devil.
The demons of hell have made her their vessel.
She’s raise all your taxes and rape your kids.
She’ll bomb the exact place you live.
Hillary Clinton is worse than Trump.
Her wardrobe comes from a garbage dump.
Her husband is even worse than her.
He ain’t no fuckin’ entrepreneur, like….
Donald Trump will rule the Earth -
with wit and grace and a terrific net worth.
He’ll cure fucking cancer and end every war.
And America will win forevermore.
Don’t feel the Bern, feel the Trump.
Don’t vote for Hillary, vote for Trump.
Fuck Paul Ryan, vote for Trump.
Donald, fucking Trump.